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Navigating Widowhood: A Widow's Handbook


A Widow's Handbook             
In my last article on navigating widowhood, I suggested going on adventures. In 2024, I spent my birthday as part of the crew on a historic tall ship. For my 79th birthday in 2025, I donned a racing suit, helmet and HANS device, mounted my Mustang Dark Horse vehicle and drag raced down the Charlotte Motor Speedway at over 100 mph! Who knows what I'll be doing in September 2026?

In between birthdays, I keep trying to think of ways to meet a special friend, someone to have dinner with, see a movie together, or share a holiday. It would certainly make the days less lonely. So I'm developing a Widow's Handbook for meeting a friend. 

Since bars are not my cup of tequila, I started hanging out at Home Depot. When asked if I need help finding anything, I say, "No thank you. I'm just browsing." Then I walk up and down the aisles looking for a handsome gentleman of a certain age with no wedding ring. Finding a handyman would be an extra bonus. Don't be shy ladies. It's okay to start a conversation, perhaps ask for his advice on something you really need like a furnace filter or light bulbs. He just might have a Eureka moment of his own about you. 

Another tip is to dress for success. Alfred Dunner chic is acceptable, but also think in terms of trendy or a little bit edgy. Consider studying the Disney Princess Comfy Squad Dolls for inspiration, but then go shop in an upscale department store such as my new favorite store, Von Maur. Top off your head to toe look with a fabulous haircut and  NIB shoes (new in box).

Speaking from experience, the importance of the scent of a woman can't be overlooked. I met my dear Edward because my Shalimar perfume enticed him to follow me and start a conversation. I have since discovered Clinique's Cocoa and Cashmere perfume which makes me want to follow myself! I've been seeing a lot of ads for Rouge Avenue perfume, a scent that supposedly men can't resist. Crafted in the UK, the manufacturer claims that Rogue Avenue "smells like first date flutters, the moment just before you lock eyes, the thrill of anticipation. This seductive scent is designed to last on your skin and theirs." That's quite the endorsement even if it is coming from the creator!

Stay tuned for more additions to this Handbook. In the meantime, have fun, dress well and remain optimistic. Comments are always welcome and I wouldn't refuse a sample of Rogue Avenue! 





Sandra Warholic Seeley is the creator and author of The Sandra Seeley Columns. She is a lifelong educator whose teaching experience ranges from suburban Bethel Park, PA to Hawaii to urban Pittsburgh Public's Homewood, Hill District and Squirrel Hill communities. She has taught in every grade level from Kindergarten through Grade 5. She has a Master's Degree in Education from The University of Pittsburgh with a minor in English. Her passion has always been the teaching of Communications: Reading and Writer's Workshop. She is now a freelance writer. To contact the author, click the following link.



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